Taylor Swift’s Cat Does Not Want To Be Part Of Her #Squad

Oh, you thought that SNL Sketch about the entire world joining the #SwiftieSquad was a joke? NOPE. Saturday Night Live just predicted the future.

Luckily, there’s at least one holdout. One rebel on the inside. And it’s… Taylor Swift‘s cat.

Meredith is allergic to joy.

A photo posted by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

Look, clearly the cat would rather be anywhere else. This proves that holding out is possible – that you don’t HAVE to give into Taylor’s charm. Even if you live in her house. EVEN if you have to depend on her for your daily servings of cat chow. You can resist the pull of indoctrination. You don’t have to have #SquadGoals!

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But if you have them, go for it. I gave in AGES ago. Check out Tay’s latest tracks on Today’s Hits!

Taylor’s Wildest Dreams

Taylor Swift was like the calm in the eye of the storm that was last night’s MTV VMAs. Sure, she wore an outfit that, had the top been slightly longer, my jewish grandma would go nuts over…

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But she also won Video of The Year for Blank Space, she presented Kanye with his Video Vanguard Award with poise and a little bit of self effacing humor, AND she premiered a brand new video.

Like what you hear? Check out more brand new music as soon as it drops on Slacker’s New Pop First!

Well, We Have This To Look Forward To

Kanye West made a big announcement last night. Some news outlets say he was “joking” about running for president, but knowing Kanye, I feel like he was 100% serious. So I’m going to start printing up the shirts today.

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OR maybe ‘Ye was just trying to see if he could cause Taylor to make her “surprised face” one more time.

You know, this time I believe that face was genuine.

I watched the VMAs so you didn’t have to! Listen to my recap on Today’s Hits.

Emojis Omitted From This Convo :(

You know how sometimes, when you’re at work during the day, you hit up your friends on IM to talk about the weekend? I do that too, and my conversations are with my fellow Slacker host, Red.

Parker: You know, Miley is hosting the VMA’s this weekend. And suddenly there is this “beef” with Taylor Swift, the biggest artist IN THE WORLD.
Parker: But I’m sure that’s legit, right?
Red: Gotta have a beef to make sure people tune in.
Red: So what’s gonna happen?
Parker: Taylor isn’t exactly participating so far, but I’d like to see her just really slam Miley somehow
Parker: Remember how Miley sang Wrecking Ball in front of that giant cat picture one time?
Parker: What if Taylor sang Bad Blood in front of a giant, weeping Miley .gif?
Red: I also remember Miley’s expression while T performed at last year’s VMAs
Parker: Oh yeah. This one?


Red: or just a big sign that says “EVERYONE LOVES ME MORE”
Parker: I mean, the whole purpose of this (I assume) is to get people talking about Miley. So what is she going to do? What’s going to be the “twerking with robin thicke” moment this year?
Red: Grinding is so 2014. I’d like to see a battle btwn Miley’s tongue and Taylor’s belly button. they both wield powers unknown. something with lazers. PEW PEW PEW
Parker: Wow. Yeah. I’ll be trying to wipe that mental image out of my mind for the rest of the day, thanks.
Red: You’re welcome


Red and I will have lots of thoughts about the VMAs when they happen Sunday night – we’re livetweeting from two coasts and want you to join us! Follow @ParkerOnSlacker and talk to me during the East Coast feed, or @RedOnSlacker if you’re watching from the West Coast.