The last time I was in a corn maze it was the middle of the day and I was truly at the sweaty panic stage because I was so lost. Fortunately I did find my way out after saying F it and cutting thru rows you weren’t supposed to only to be greeted by kids who thought I was a complete weirdo. So if you do happen to hit up Summers Farm in Frederick, Md, and you reach the sweaty panic lost stage either sing your favorite Taylor song loudly until someone finds you or look all “Blank Space” crazy when you crash down corn walls.
When was the last time someone invested 8 MONTHS into making something for you? besides a baby?? I can confidently say “never” but I’m not Taylor Swift. Check out the backstory here
One can only hope two things, 1. Taylor hires Jadda, “The Mysterious Knitter” to work for her fashion line, LEI and 2. That we all will one day find one person to love/adore/cherish us as much as Swifties love/adore/cherish Taylor.
What’s worse than spending a week pelted by dust and wind and surrounded by EDM fans that haven’t showered the entire time? Knowing you might be there with celebrities who are trying to “discover themselves”.
Taylor is a consumate professional. A calclated business woman who recently owned/branded one of her gauche dance moves, “The Mom-Croon”…so one can only assume that the asynchronous swivel motion at the :22 mark was probably planned and there wasn’t a lot of eye contact between Beck and Taylor so you know it was well-rehearsed. So what to name it?
The Swivel Pointer?
The Suave Swivel?
The Round and Round Get Down?
Btw, I can’t fault Swifties for fangirling because I’m definitely a “Vinnie”. The way Annie/St. Vincent shreds and struts?!?!
Taylor took to Tumblr to explain, “The Mom-Croon – (noun) A dance move invented at the 2014 Grammy Awards. To sway, perform, and sing along to a song in an extremely emotional or sentimental way, possibly incorporating hand gestures. Eyes closed, lost in the music. The way your mom gets taken away by a tune from her high school days, glass of red wine in hand, shuffling around the room as her teenage kids roll their eyes in disdain. Cynics may judge the Mom-Crooners (MC’s as they are commonly referred to in the dance world) as it is a form of dance only perfected by those willing to be absolutely swept away by the feels you get when you hear a certain song. Those who know how to Mom Croon cannot see the eye rolls of haters. They have reached a level of musical transcendence that is hater-proof. Once you perfect the mom croon, you are truly free.
Used in a sentence: “Oh look, Taylor’s being embarrassing again– just mom-crooning away in the corner by herself because Sometimes by Britney Spears came on. Oh God. Now she’s crying.”*
Aw yisssss. Bring it ON.
Oh and don’t forget to keep Party Hits locked, cocked, loaded, it’s my dance battle station of choice 🙂
Good luck and lets go get ’em!
**I’m going to assume you can Mom-Croon with or without tears…preferably without.
If Taylor is using a CSCG, I’d like to volunteer Lara Marie Schoenhals to take over programming duties.
Lara went to see Taylor Swift in Santa Clara and by the looks of her hilarious (kinda NSFW because of language) parody video, T’s celeb cameo bit may have jumped the shark. It started out really strong with Team USA and her girl squad but doesn’t it feel like someone is making last minute calls after Joan and Julia?
Not that either of these ladies is anything less than spectacular. Julia is “America’s Sweetheart” and seems nice in just about every acting role she’s ever been in so she’s gotta be great in real life right? and maybe Joan and Taylor are BFFs who spend long nights waxing about The Bangladesh Liberation War??
But be honest, when you first found out about Taylor bringing Joan out on stage, didn’t it feel like the couple pictured below?
*Thx to Gage Allan for giving me an excuse to use that photo