Kanye’s VMA Speech Could’ve Used A Good Editor

So rumor has it, MTV gave Kanye West license to do whatever he wanted with his 4 minutes onstage last night. And in typical ‘Ye style, he used it to make what was supposed to be an inspirational speech.


Exceeeeeeeept… something got lost in translation. While Kanye started to tell a few stories, or seemed to have a good point to make, he never actually completed those thoughts. He seems to be referencing his Famous video – although he never tells us that’s what he’s doing – and his ill-fated call to Taylor Swift.

Check out the full transcript, courtesy of Time Magazine:

I am Kanye West, and that feels especially great to say this year. I came here to present my new video, but before I do that, I’mma talk. Now, later tonight, ‘Famous’ might lose to Beyoncé, but I can’t be mad. I’m always wishing for Beyoncé to win, so.

But for people to understand just how blessed we are… It was an expression of our now, our fame right now, us on the inside of the TV. You know, just to put… the audacity to put Anna Wintour right next to Donald Drumpf. I mean, like, I put Ray J in it, bro. This is fame, bro! Like, I see you Amber. My wife is a G. Not a lot of peoples’ wives would let them say that right there. We came over in the same boat. Now we all in the same bed. Well, maybe different boats, but uh.

But if you think about last week, there were 22 people murdered in Chicago. You know, like, people come up to me like, ‘Yeah, that’s right! Take Taylor!’ But bro, like, I love all y’all. That’s why I called her.

So I was speaking at the Art Institute last year, and a kid came up to me and said ‘Three of my friends died, and I don’t know if I’m gonna be the next.’ And it has to, you know you have to think, like, when you’re a senior and it’s the last month and you just don’t feel like doing any more work. If you feel like you seeing people dying right next to you, you might feel like, what’s the point? You know like life could be like, starting to feel worthless in a way. I know times for me, I sit down and talk to older, like, like, rich people. You know, a.k.a. white, you know. And they tell me, ‘Don’t compare yourself to Steve Jobs. Don’t compare yourself to Walt Disney,’ and my friend Zekiah[sp?] told me… they tell me, ‘Don’t compare yourself to these people, right.’ My friend Zekiah[sp?] told me there’s three keys to keeping people impoverished: that’s taking away their esteem, taking away their resources, and taking away their role models. My role models are artists, merchants. There’s less than ten that I can name in history. Truman. Ford. Hughes. Disney. Jobs. West.

Bro. Bro! Tonight, we here to have fun. I’m standing in front of my idol, Puff Daddy. I’m standing in front of my wife, Kim Kardashian West. I’m standing in front of the future: Chance the Rapper, 2 Chainz, Jaden Smith. Bro, we are undeniably the influence, the thought leaders. I’m gonna play y’all a piece of my art, and I just hope y’all have a good time. Play that.

Honestly, I see what he’s going for here – especially when he starts to tell the story about the kids in Chicago – but he keeps getting lost along the way. I’m sure this was an amazing speech in his head, but if he really wants to inspire us, he needs to give us complete thoughts, not just an outline.

Of course, right after that he premiered the new video for Fade, which basically wiped all of our memories anyway.

LOL wut?

But maybe I’m wrong! Maybe you WERE inspired by Kanye’s speech! Tell me how you feel below, and get your Yeezy fix with Slacker’s Kanye West: DNA station!

According To This Rapper, A Studio Sesh With Kanye Is Like Training With Yoda In Dagobah…Just With More Pudding And Porn.

Source: Uproxx

If you are unfamiliar, Die Antwoord is a South African rap group that includes MC Ninja, Yo-Landi Vi$$er, DJ Hi-Tek. They are incredibly talented and they are a blast to see live but they are no doubt an acquired taste.

Some would say they are creepy/disturbing/aggressive, others would say they are outrageous/absurd/trashy.

All of those descriptions are correct in the best way…When you do a music video that includes a Lady Gaga-impersonator giving birth to a prawn, you’ve earned all of those adjectives and yes they know exactly what they are doing.

Knowing that you would think it would take a lot to offend Ninja but no, one meeting with Kanye was quite enough.

Check out his extremely NSFW story above that may or may not be legit but entertaining none the less. Then give Die Antwoord’s music a shot…you just might like how “freeky” they are. and I meant what I said by NSFW, the language/content might make a co-worker pass out.



If you aren’t at Coachella either, it appears we are missing a continuation of Taylor Swift’s 1989 tour the euphoria of realizing the artist you are “WOOO”ing for is going to bring out a massive surprise guest only to make you WOOO even louder!

You are also missing fashion styles from a bag of clothes you donated to Goodwill sometime between 2001-05.




ASAP ROCKY/KANYE WEST. Who learned a very valuable lesson on why you can’t be late for your set.

As you may have heard on Music News, just because we’re not at Coachella doesn’t mean we can’t play along!

How to play “Cameochella”:

  • Spontaneously play an artist of your choice preferably at inopportune moments ie: business meeting, study group, wake, quiet carpool, etc.
  • Bonus points for jumping on someone’s shoulders and or pretending to crowdsurf.

Ps – This game is trademarked by me so don’t even think about it.


Kanye Gets Deep With Guys Usually Blamed For Trying To Torture/Kill Celebs. Thanks Them For Keeping Him “Alive”.

Source: Spin

Kanye gave back to the vehicle who helped create him/his in-laws with some curbside wisdom about hypocrisy, artistry and “truth” while his wife took advantage of their new baby’s nap schedule.

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

Reddit Reveals Kanye West Is 50% More Influential/Tolerable When He Is Asleep.

So today we went baby shopping with @johnlegend & @chrissyteigen Kanye & North were a little too quiet. We found them passed out in the middle of the store #TheRealLifeOfPablo

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

Source: Mashable

While Kanye was probably dreaming of another duel with Picasso, Redditors pulled out the ceremonial sharpee known as Photoshop and the result is arguably more endearing than anything Kanye has said in months.

From movie studio logos:


to new IKEA products:

kanye ikea

To Sad Keanu and Sleepy Ye.

sad keanu

That’s just the beginning. Click here for more. 


Obama Endorses Kanye For President…Kind Of.

Source: Marketwatch

How hard is it to be president, honestly?? All you gotta do is figure out how to handle the budget, education, health care, military, environment, pro-lifers, pro-choicers, gun enthusiasts, anti-gun advocates, lobbyists, oil, Wall Street, Putin and North Korea…and throw a few parties.


Oh! and Kim Kardashian can work on a “Take-Care-Of-Your-Selfie” campaign…or something.

I may have left a few things out but we still have time to get it all figured out. More importantly, let’s start decorating The White House.

The Cultural Icons Kanye West HASN’T Compared Himself To….Not Yet Anyway.

NME compiled an impressive list of all the cultural icons Kanye resembles…according to him.

You name it, he’s said it.

Steve Jobs, Shakespeare, Beethoven, God and many more. Check out the full list here.

Even Vanellope Von Schweetz!


In fact I’m thinkin’ it may have been easier to make a list of the icons Kanye hasn’t compared himself to…






but the day is young! Stay tuned.

Anyone Have A ‘Yeezy 2020’ Bumpersticker On Their Car Yet?

Source: Daily Beast

In the words of Joey Lawrence, Woah.

Kanye has a “Ready For Kanye” super PAC officially registered!

Either this is an elaborate scheme to point out just how the ridiculousness of political campaigns OR this campaign is really going to happen which will then point out the ridiculousness of political campaigns.



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